|
 This
one is for Rondi, whose spirited 'haiku' enlivens everything. The song now playing
in the background is "The tide is high" by Blondie. The hungry person knows no
laws.
 THE DIRTY GAMES YOUR PARENTS
PLAY WITH YOUR LIFE
Your parents push you into schools
for many reasons, one of which is because they want you to become wealthy so that they can
share in your wealth. You are an investment. That is why your parents are upset when you don’t do well in
your exams.
It is hard to believe that your parents love you when they keep forcing you to do things
that you don’t want to do just to please them.
 | Love is unconditional and parental
concern is not
love since it is conditional upon your obedience and
submission to their beliefs. |
All those talk about your parents
having to make many sacrifices so that you may have a
sound education is a load of rubbish. It is typical parental ‘sales talk’.
| Why do parents have to do
‘sales talk’? What are they selling? Hmmm . . . That is a tough one. I think it all comes down to fear. Parents, like everyone else,
are frightened people. They fear not succeeding in life, not realizing their dreams,
death, poverty, hell, retribution, disease, failures, demons, abandonment and a host of
other things. How well or poorly they treat you is an indicator of the fears they are carrying inside them! |
 Parents do not believe in many of the things
they talk about. They grew up getting confused and brainwashed just like everybody else. They go along with the others and pretend that everything is all
right to hide their fears. Take religion, for example. When parents talk about God and
religion, they usually do NOT understand or believe in what they are talking about! They
tell lies to their children... They
lie to themselves... They lie to their Gods even! They lie because of their children,
their families, their Gods, THEMSELVES. What a farce!
| Why do parents have to lie? They lie because they are frightened for their children, for
themselves, for their Gods, even! They lie because they fear that their children might not
succeed in life knowing how difficult life can be when there are so many malevolent
organizations around and the
government to contend with. They lie because they have NOT realized their own dreams and
they don’t want other people, including their children, to know about it. Life sucks!
|
That is why parents build their dreams around their children and will use all means,
including trickery, lies and violence to make sure that their children realize their
dreams for them! Doesn’t this make the parents utterly selfish, even evil? I believe
so.
Many children don’t even know that they are carrying their parents’ dreams. They
are confused when their parents push them into activities they don’t like. “Why
do my parents keep forcing me to do this and that,” they ask themselves. They
don’t understand why they must be their parents’ hopes, wish, despair, dream and
fantasy.
Parents are intelligent creatures but too clever for their own good. Parents are authority
figures and like other authority figures, they abuse their authority repeatedly and then
fool their children into believing that they abuse them out of love. They can get away
with all kinds of abusiveness because the society allows it. They abuse their children left and right and don’t have to
apologize for it. They treat their children as if they (the children) are their private
property. Parents are evil when they use their legal authority to bully, cheat, lie,
abuse, ill-treat, hurt and torture their children for their selfish ends. Some parents are
good and don’t abuse their authority.
What are your parents like? Do they treat
you fairly, kindly and
lovingly? I wonder.
 Why don’t parents tell their
children that they (the children) are being asked to carry their parents’ dreams? I
think that if they ask their children to decide freely, most of them will say
“no.” It is a natural thing.
Children are people and they have minds of their own. No one will willingly carry the
dream of another person because everyone is born unique with a special purpose in life.
We are all born not to carry the dreams of others but to follow OUR OWN
DREAMS. That is the way it is. That is life. That is why each person is born with unique
as an individual with the talent to do one thing better than all others. That is the will
of life or God. Ironically, religious people are among the most tyrannical of parents
despite all their strict rules and talk about God.
So now you know why parents treat their children the way they do. Different parents may
have different motives but the most common one is the desire to realize their dreams
through their children. This desire for continuity of themselves can drive some parents
into a frenzy on matters that concern their children. Such selfish acts of the parents act
to prevent their children from becoming what they are meant to be. This is why almost
everyone dislikes their parents although many of them will not dare to voice their true
feelings. That is why it is said that many people are using only 10% of their mind power.
Parents have different ways to show their affection for their concern,
that is, their children. Some
pamper their children to the limits while others use the stick. Some use lies, trickery
and bribery; others act self-sacrificial. Whichever methods the parents used, many
children suffer from an unrealistic sense of exaggerated self-importance. They know they
are important because their parents and the authority figures spend so much time on them.
Little do they realize that their parents and the authorities have ulterior motives!
In families where the parents have
succeeded in brainwashing their children that they beat, scolded and abuse them because of
love, the children will be obedient until they reach a level of maturity. When young, most
children will adore their parents and believe everything their parents say, including lies
and nonsense. Children enjoy a sense of exaggerated self-importance at the hands of
parents skilled in the art of persuasion. Yes, parenting can be a nasty business.
It is general knowledge that it is very easy to influence or brainwash children during
their early years especially before the age of seven. After the age of seven, it becomes
harder and harder for anyone to influence them. Or, is it? As you grow older (and wiser),
you begin to see your parents, teachers and elders for what they are. You begin to see
their true colors. You become aware of their lies, trickery, deceit and abuse of authority
over
you.
 Growing
up is such a painful process because you have to come to terms with the fact that your
parents, teachers, friends and others are not what they make themselves out to be. When
you were a child, they look like angels and heroes to you. Now that you can think better, they all appear to be hateful manifestations of the devil. No
wonder you feel lost like a 'child in time' during your growing up years! There is
internal conflict within you and your independent spirit conflicts with your parents’
authority and other authority figures. Sometimes, you feel so angry inside that you
don’t know what you want anymore!
You can resolve the conflict within by living in delight as an individual, a Tradisian*.
You can help on the purpose of life in YOUR own way. Free yourself from the useless ties,
from organizations, false beliefs, fears and limitations.
If you want to grow up to become what you are
meant to be you have to sever all ties. This does
not mean abandoning your family or living as
a hermit. Far from it! Stop believing in obedience,
passiveness, submissiveness, obligation and
sins. Be friends with everyone, including your
god, on equal terms. Treat all your days,
everyone and everything, equally. Stop being
a member, slave, follower, zombie or
robot citizen - it is a waste of your time,
energy and other resources. |
People are interdependent to a certain extent only; thus, to
become members, slaves, followers, zombie or robot citizen is going to the extreme. Stop
all the obeying, following, slaving and crying.
You are only one but you are one individual with multiple skills, abilities and talents.
Be your own self, truly and completely, and you will succeed in life.
Open your eyes and see clearly what YOU really want to do with YOUR life. What’s
really important is that YOU are a unique species of life.
 Go
ahead and live your own dream, NOT the dream of your parents, NOT the dream of your
priest, NOT the dream of your government.
Live your own dream. You can do it. I know you can! A new world awaits you!
- Tan Kok Heng
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No one is more liable to make
mistakes
than the man who acts only on reflection.
— Vauvenargues
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